I am semi-retired, an extrovert, and do some volunteer work. I've become the angry one now because my wife's heart has become hardened and it's due to my inability to be compassionate to someone who has such distain and malice toward me. I am leaning heavily towards divorce at this point because my husband will not take responsibility for his anger issues. Many marriages are seriously harmed because spouses overreact in anger due to the failure to resolve resentment from past hurts with a parent, sibling, former dating partners, spouse or from other important relationships. What my partner does that I find increasingly difficult to deal with is to constantly, every single day to blast something. She used to be this listening, kind, soft person who gets emotional on little things and cry over it. Patience and compassion are the foundations of positive energy and cooperation among people.
Trained mental health professionals only have a so-so track record… and any success they have takes a long time…. We were fixated on spending the day with his family, but because I felt like I needed to voice my opinion on not wanting the day to go that way with his pissed for who knows what reason- it got worst. The biggest challenge of living with a resentful or angry person is to keep from becoming one yourself—or else, the high contagion and reactivity of resentment and are likely to make you into someone you are not. It's important to have strategies and skills in place so you feel comfortable saying no, dealing with conflict, and how to value yourself. That your partner avoids sharing analytical conversations about herself suggests that they don't feel safe to do this within the relationship. I went to get another one.
He has a drug problem, to him it's not, refuses to apoligize for anything he's done wrong, refuses to complement ,unless it's to manipulate later, and never forgives. I don't know what to do!! I sent it to my husband. She rarely, if ever, expressed any appreciation for what I was doing and just pointed out what needed to be done. He refused to back off knowing they were not going to stand for his refusal as well as his ex military friends. I go to work to just try and find peace within myself- which works because Im no where in his pressence.
My son is 12 and now treats me like my husband does so Your wife is lucky to have a husband that is not to prideful to save your family! Truthfully, I read on with a wary eye as well, because fundamentally the only person responsible for your wife's actions is herself and same thing with you. Heaven forbid I say his son needs to do his homework instead of playing video games all day or clean his room. I always try to explain his side. People ask me all the time how long my vacation is or when do I have to go back. I would have left years ago, but I worry about the impact on our kids.
The best anyone can do is to truly understand it isn't you, it's him, and if you stay, to develop a life that gives you outside interests and meaning so you have perspective when you're caught up in another whirlwind of anger. I have invested everything into her and my marriage, and left myself with nothing. Your husband will become more and more the man and the leader of the household that you want him to be. I do everything for him. But he is the complete opposite. Not saying that is your case.
She doesn't deserve a family such as this one. I do not have a job right now because i cannot get one because we are currently living in a foreign country due to his job. I promise he is mentally ill. The following year i lost my mother. Confirm that all you want is to be happy and for her to be happy.
Until you connect logically and emotionally with this deep truth, you'll be constantly carrying around anger and resentment because you're conflicted between what you keep hearing and what you know is true. By being assertive, you are respectful of yourself as well as the person you are engaging with. He may believe nothing is wrong, though I doubt that. I met someone else and ended up getting pregnant again, he bailed and while this whole time my husband was begging me back knowing I was pregnant. Why I am the only one who is always have to keep quiet and not to escalate things and find an excuse for him why he is angry???? In that sense, anger could be thought of as an intermediate emotion. I just watch as he storms off and slams the door behind him.
My chance to leave is every summer because my kids go with their father and his son goes to his mom. I hope trying to stick by him and offering him options for change, is worth it. Anger is within a person. We would go to church together and everything seemed fine. We are a church going family and he has just gotten worse and worse over the last several yrs.